Well Being (2016)

Total:  7.1

Spiritual Connection (2016)

Total:  7.0

Discomfort (2016)

Total:  3.5

Event highlights (2016)

Home renovation

• Courtyard trellis (vertical slats for succulents)
• Laying floors (and finding missing floors)
• Bathroom (washing basin, remove mirror and shower doors, towel rack, new mirror)
• Buying furniture
• Photos (selecting, buying frames, printing, putting up)
• Watering system

Wisdom Trove

• Wisdom Trove editing
• Putting in section headings (Headings and sub-headings)

Events

• Farm with Brendan (fireplace in, fence out, clearing trees)  
• Day in Melbourne
• Sydney with Jo (Blue Mountains, Sydney walks)
• Hiking with Russell. (RNP Coastal Track, Mermaid Pool, Canyon, Hanging Rock)
• Sharon dates (walk, movie; picnic, watch BL video at her home)
• Cape Town (roadtrip with Jo to pick up Matt)
• Eckhart hikes
• Yogi friendship (meetings at The Bot, Sculptures by the Sea, Gore Cove, Le Perouse)
• Louise (spiritual discussions on a high)

Spiritual Moments (2016)

Letting go

• Experiencing the letting go of impulse to rush and be present while doing DIY. Focus on giving each action full attention. Amazing!!

Gratitude

• Thank you Divine Consciousness.  Saying it all time.
• A real knowing that all inspiration comes from a divine source, consciousness creating through me. Starting to say thanks whenever it flows.

Expanded awareness

• Expanded awareness at Khirtan
• Expanded awareness. I am him. I am her.

Movie high back

• Movie" experience back - high. Discuss with Louise and Yogi.
• Movie theme: Then mentioned 3 times in one day (Scott Kelby, Mooji, Kanangra) plus Sharon 
• “God made Visible Book."  (movie in the can)
• Field of experience. (Londolozi) video

Synchronicity

• Jesus - and his twin walks past.

God = Awareness

• Awareness (and Life) instead of God
• Deep awareness in park. All spiritual thoughts are empty, pointing to this
• Sharing with Sharon, cry at "this"
• Sense even "I am" is empty, go deep.  Sense of I am is phenomenon.  Deep nothing.

More

• Sadness about lambs, suffering of animals - vegetarian.
• Joy in the created achievements of the greats, of the creators.
• Stuck to surface of universe looking down. Vertigo experience. Headless.
• Great sessions with Nic, getting back on track with Bogeyville.
• Mindful walks with Jason

Freedom

• Really smiling and laughing at the voices in my head. Great.
• Labelling the voices (mind patterns) in my head that drown out the silence. (Mr Sinister, Mr Spiritual Hero etc.)  Really helps to get focus back on moment.

Priceless moments (2016)

Moments of bliss

• Lying on my balcony chair
• Botanica with Yogi. Deep discussions .
• Sessions with Louise on high, including movie discussion
• Sharon (sharing, beach, walk, picnic, Awake)
• Epic Game of Thrones S6 e 9 and10
• Mum offer to loan from trust

Rennovation

• Courtyards, my room, steps
• Photos printed and up
• Found floors - assertiveness works
• My plants (balcony and courtyards)
• Peace of finishing house, able to focus on Wisdom Trove
• Eckhart Group over for picnic, then see house.

Cape Town

• Mindful walks around Constantia block with Jason
• Sharing bed with darling Jason
• Miss Saigon music. (Sun and Moon)
• Annie
• 7 aside rugby
• Clifton for swim
• Derek and Kobus visit 
• Mum tearful farewell 
• Battlefield 1 with Matt 
• Swim Danger Bay 

Roadtrip with Jo

• Swim in lagoon at Wilderness with Jo
• Throwing ball in Sedgefield 
• Pizza in Wilderness. 

Movies

Gratitude (2016)

Grateful for

• Srini moving in
• Gaia not hit head
• Resentment not expressed to Sue and Chris
• Didn't smash nose or worse at Silvermine
• Glasses - replace long distance ones
• Mum money nearly 50 K loan

DIY

• Milly peeing - no rush to do floors
• Did get black vanity (thought I'd got white)
• Found discontinued floors
• Grey caulk fills cracks
• Abundance opened by renting 3rd room
• DIY budget not into red  ($20K)
• Bunnings receipt found

Progress (2016)

Progress

• Utter simplicity, only essentials
• Clean, uncluttered room
• Smoothies
• Suntanning on balcony
• Renting out two room - extra $1400 pm
• Mindful walks increasingly mindful
• Sun glasses
• Eyes tested and reading glasses. 
• Putlocker. Solar Movies. 

Purchases

• Blue tooth speakers
• New clothes

Life Trove and photography

• Spiritual journal online. 
• Lightroom Universe and printing of photos
• Photos on my wall

Home renovations

• Finish house
• Floors
• Toilet

Wisdom Trove

• Headings and sub-headings

Spiritual

• Really smiling and laughing at the voices in my head. Great.
• Labelling the voices (mind patterns) in my head that drown out the silence. (Mr Sinister, Mr Spiritual Hero etc.)  Really helps to get focus back on moment. 
• Experiencing the letting go of impulse to rush and be present while doing DIY. Focus on giving each action full attention. Amazing!!
• A massive and direct experience of the huge impact of tension (especially urge to rush) and the deepest profound impact of l
• Thank you Divine / Inner Consciousness.  Saying it all time.
• A real knowing that all inspiration comes from a divine source, consciousness creating through me. Starting to say thanks whenever it flows.

Insights (2016)

• Love the mind; the being. "Its ok my baby"
• Just notice what's here. What's here Now?
• Utter simplicity. Absolutely necessary? Space up.
• All spiritual thoughts are empty, arising from emptiness and returning to it. All pointing to this.
• May all beings be happy and free
• Watching mind and labeling
• This is a natural world, governed by natural laws, unfolding a meant to, and Life is on the journey too.
• A multiverse of different laws ?
• The totality of the universe brought me and this moment into being. Exactly as meant to be. As am I. 
• Don't act in anger or resentment (Chris, Sue)
• What is happening now? What is arising in the space I am?

Special connections (2016)

Connect

• Sharon sharing and dates (Balls Head, Awake)
• Photos for Shushann and Lydia
• Heather Kindle
• Gaia so happy to see me

Srini and Rajesh

• Srini gets job, helped by me
• Help Rajesh with CV

Jo

• Jo's trip to Sydney
• Jo scare
• Jo robbery

Jilly

• Jilly fetch from hospital and help settle in
• Jilly new computer

Yogi

• Botanica with Yogi for spiritual chats
• Help Yogi with "illness" (depression) and from going high.
• Yogi - iphone 7
• Inspire Yogi for hiking
• Hiking with Yogi and sculptures
• Yogi with Jo. Not advice, just be space for her.

Synchronicity: Life is God's movie

In 2016, I woke up in a very elevated state similar in some ways with my elevated states of consciousness that I experienced during my "enlightened mania" experience in 2015.  The strong sense came over me again that life is unfolding perfectly and is a movie created, directed and experienced by God through each of us.  Life is God's movie and it is already in the can. I felt a wonderful sense of peaceful bliss at the thought.

I got out of bed, dressed and got onto a bus to go to the Spit Bridge to join some friends for a hike.  As I was driving, I received an email from Sharon giving me a link to online information about one of her favourite spiritual gurus; Paramahansa Yogananda. I explored the link to discover that "Life is God's movie" is one of his favourite metaphors.  

Later that day, I listened to a teaching by Mooji. In the talk, he too used the metaphor.  He said something along the lines of "It's all a movie. It's all just happening. Consciousness (God) is the great movie maker."

An hour or two later, an email arrived with a teaching from Scott Kiloby. In this teaching, Scott too used up the metaphor that life is a movie.

The next day, Sharon send me an email with a quote from Barry Long, a spiritual guru she admires. In it, he too used the metaphor that life is God's movie.

A couple of days later, I mentioned the "Life is God's movie" metaphor.  Yogi said "Wow, I've just read a book that contains that metaphor." He lent me the book by Merlyn Swan. She uses the metaphor including the quote: "The film of life is already in the can and all I can do is view one frame at a time. I have no choice or free will. I am a character playing a role, dancing the divine dance, the way God wants. Independence and volition are part of the illusion."  Merlyn Swan is a relatively unknown author and the chances for Yogi to be reading that book is very slim.

So, in short, I woke up with the express feeling and thought "Life is God's movie." Then in the space of only a few days, I came across this metaphor used expressly by 5 different spiritual teachers.  There was an immense sense of wonder at the synchronicity. It felt very meaningful.

Since, then, I have researched this metaphor extensively and as of 2022, I am writing a book about it.

Related

• Life is God's movie (on Wisdom Trove)

Affirmation (2016)

Proud

• Rennovations, especially floor
• Such a lovely place. (blind lady)
• Mum "flabbergasted"
• Got Godfrey Hurst to find me floors
• Sharon "so bright, rare profundity, joy, leaps"
• Thank you Graeme for your courageous, timely decision.  Bev
• The plants

Yogi

• Great talk - you're a smart guy, not in your league! Thanks.

Rose

• I think this is on your path...yeah! I love your passion in recording the natural world, as you see it, in which you walk (and leap!). Hugs, Rose

Rennovations

• We are speechless and flabbergasted and so, so impressed! We had no idea you were so creative and had learned so much. Everything looks amazing and it is no wonder you are proud of your balconies and the garden. What a huge difference it has made. We would hardly recognize the place! Mike is sitting here saying "I am so impressed" over and over and "I can't believe what he has done". Well done! Xx  Mum & Mike
• Wow, Wow, Wow! It looks fantastic. Love all the colour and creativity. Can't wait to see it in person now!!! xx
• It’s so much lighter. Shamista
• You must be happy with how its come out. Amazing difference white makes.  Matt
• Elna: Loved plants, hanging garden idea, floor, so much work. Liked steps (no carpet!)
• Woman measuring house: Wow, such a lovely place. With all levels.
• Brendan “You’ve added to value."

Aimee

• The photos are so beautiful Graeme - you are really able to capture the essence of the beauty in nature.   So much diversity!
• Your photography is ever deepening. 

Sharon

• You are such a beautiful being, and I truly love how given to God, by Grace, thou art. I trust all is continuing to go well. I am with a deep sense of thee these last couple of days. It is a deeply bright and indescribably beautiful place.
• I'm just loving your photos, Graeme! And seeing you leaping and leaping and leaping all over the earth with your bright eyes and big smile... I've been glowing and laughing! So gorgeous.
• You know, there's such a beautiful, radiant, transparency in you these days.  
• You are a dear man, and I enjoy getting to know you, and our friendship. I love your openness, profundity and joy, among so many other beautiful states and traits I observe and feel around you. I find with you an intense brightness and fineness that is rare. So thank you. Thank you for being you.
• You are always so joyful, bright and giving, and I so love that about you.

Challenges (2016)

Challenges

• 4 story flat next door + development behind
• No hiking - housebound with house
• Strong fatigue with meds, life becoming little
• Scarcity - "new reality"
• Self conscious - no conversation. 
• Brain - bad memory / RAM
• Trump and Brexit
• Dani profile pic

Resentment

• Resentments - Sue
• Liza and the vet
• Resentment - Chris (taking over conversation at Eckhart)
• Resentment - J (not sharing)

Cape Town

• Reduced Zyprexa increased obsession?
• Knock nose at Silvermine
• Heart hiccups
• Money from trust. Resentment with mum for her silence.
• Sharmista leaving (and not paying rent)
• Srini leaving ?
• Chrisel boyfriend
• S longing
• Scarcity verse South Africans.  "Lost so much."
• Getting older: appearance, wrinkles under eyes, losing out sx
• Stomach fat

Experience from a Deck Chair

I was looking out into the sky from my deck chair on my balcony.  I had an immense sense of being the space (created by the eyes looking out from the head that  could not see itself) in which the clouds and other forms like birds flying by were arising and subsiding.  I got a sense too of any thoughts that arose as coming into the space from "out there", rather than emerging from within my head.  They just passed through without getting stuck.

What made it so much more powerful was the sense that I was pinned to the very edge of the universe looking down into the universe (my part of it, my world).  It was such a strong sense that it gave me a scary and yet delicious feeling of vertigo.  I felt my back (which I  also could not see, and never can, no matter where I am) merging with an infinite Space behind me. A Space far vaster than the universe itself (my field of experience).  It felt as if the universe, as immense as it is, was contained in a sphere and I was pinned to it's outer surface with my back merging with the infinite nothingness (formless Consciousness) outside it.

I felt the space in front of the eyes (the space in which all forms arise and subside) merging with the infinite Space behind.  The more I sensed the Space behind merging with the space in front, the deeper the sense of expansiveness I felt and the more I sensed that I was that Space.  I felt tapped into something vast that was immensely peaceful but also immensely intelligent.

I still have this sense now (not as strong) when I anchor myself in the body and look out of my head into the space that contains my computer screen.   A space of awareness in front, and a sense of  vast space behind.  The forms in the foreground (arising and subsiding) AND an infinite Space in the background, both merging with each other through the aliveness of the body.


Reflections From A Deck Chair 

I gaze into the sky below
stuck to the ceiling of the world
by an invisible force
that makes leaves fall in autumn,
breasts sag with age,
daredevils hurtle from planes,
water cascade into ravines,
chairs collapse under the fat,
snow avalanche from cliffs,
rain patter onto roofs,
and ostriches stay earthbound
as much as they might want to fly.

Written: 1997 (on a holiday in Turkey)

Non fiction books read (2016)

The Future of God: A practical approach to Spirituality for our times (Deepak Chopra)

The Varieties of Religious Experience: A Study in Human Nature (William James)

2016 Highlights

Home renovations, visits from Jo and Russell, farm with Brendan, Yogi friendship, Eckhart Group hikes, Cape Town

Priceless moments

• Spending New Year's Eve at the Ashram especially the fire ceremony and tribal yoga.
• A fun morning kayaking with Chris.
• A great hike to Mount Solitary with the Hiking Gang.
• Jo coming to visit me in Sydney and doing lots of walking and hiking, especially our walk from Waverton to Lady Macquarie's Chair, photographing all the major Sydney landmarks.
• A visit to the Blue Mountains hiking with Jo - hiking, staying at the backpackers and buying a rug.
• Amazing Thai food at Khao Pla with Brendan and Eva, especially the sticky rice dessert.
• Exploring The Chinese Garden for the first time with Jo.
• Russell visiting and doing some great hikes, especially the The Coastal Track hike where we leapt into the Figure of 8 Pool and had a swamp wallaby get close and personal with us at the camp-sight.
• Introducing Russell to my hiking friends by doing The Canyon and Hanging Rock hikes.
• Manly Scenic Walk 3 times with Jo, JC and co and my Eckhart Group.
• Hiking with my Eckhart Group -  Lane Cove, Muogamarra Nature Reserve and Manly Scenic Walk.
• Some lovely times with Sharon - watching "Awake", Barry Long DVD and a walk at Ball's Head.
• Special outings with Yogi including a walk Walk to Gore Cove. walking at La Perouse and Sculptures by The Sea.  
• Inspiring Yogi to get an iphone 7 and his delight with it; especially Siri.
• With Sue, a wonderful lecture on Frank Hurley and Shackleton.  So inspiring.  It was photographer Hurley to thank for making the heroic journey so famous.
• Discovering that sweet, shy Dennis, who works at our local IGA, is a heavy metal vocalist and going to listen to him  perform.  We had to put toilet paper in our ears!
• Doing portraits for Shushann and Lydia and especially Lydia's delight with the results.
• Two great evenings of Kirtan with my Eckhart Group, and a stroll on the beach at night.
• Photographing beautiful children at Gavin's book launch .  What a year for him. Soon he'll have three books published.
• Birthdays at the Botanica for the Four Musketeers:  Aimee, Chris, Me, and Yogi.  
• Many lunches (yummy Ape Crepe, Malaysian toast and quiche) and coffees at The Botanica with Yogi where we solved the existential issues of the universe to the refrain of "We've solved it again!"
• Exploring spiritual matters with Louise, on such a high.
• Doing meditation group  with Nic again and adorable little Gaia always so happy to see me.
• A roadtrip to Sedgefield with Jo, especially stopping off for a game drive on the way.
• Photography outings with Jo: Chapman's Peak and Muizenberg to Kalk Bay walk.
• A fun New Year's Eve with Jo at Blouberg.

... and especially, completing my home renovations project:

• Creating a trellis for the courtyards.
• Laying the floors.
• After running out of floors and discovering they had been discontinued, my elation when the manufacturer found some.
• Choosing my favourite photos and having them printed and framed to put on the wall.
• Shopping at IKEA and Spotlight, buying new furniture and curtains, including with Jo.
• The watering system installed, working great.
• Matt moving out and Srini moving in.
• Earning an extra $1400 a month by renting out my spare room to Sharmista.
• My beautiful courtyards and balcony (including my Buddha statue) ; a flowering oasis of plants.
• Srini managing to get the E&Y job, partly thanks to my help with his CV and interview questions.
• Suntanning on the balcony, enjoying the plants.

Less happy moments

• Discovering a human body on a hike in the Glenbrook National Park with Geoff and Lydia. 
• Russell banging his leg so hard on the Mermaid Falls hike that he needed surgery when he got back to London.
• The potential of a 4 storey development next door and doing all we could to stop it.
• Losing Jilly's car keys; then finding them on the roof (!) after I'd been driving a few days with ones made.
• The Boting's house getting burgled.
• Bashing my nose on a rock when diving in at Silvermine. 

Purchases

• Bluetooth speakers, IKEA furniture

Movies and TV series watched

• The Revenant
• 7 Wonders of the Industrial World (Series)
• Cosmos: A Space Oddysey (series)
• Daredevil (series)
• Narcos (series)
• Outlander (series)
• River (series)
• Stranger Things (series)
• Short Term 12
• Star Wars: Force Awakens
• Sully
• Wildepeople
• Jessica Jones (series)
• Room
• Hell or Highwater
• Game of Thrones (Season 6) - especially episodes 9&10!
• Zootopia
• The Lego Movie

Culinary delights

• Ape Crepe & Malaysian Toast (Botanica)
• Botanica Quiche
• Pizza in Wilderness: Fig, blue cheese, ham

---

2016 Index of Links

House renovations

• Home renovations project
• Home renovations peek look (Mar)
• Sourcing the missing floors (May)
• IKEA with Jo (Jul)
• Matt moves out (Jul)
• Srini moves in (Jul)
• Flowering Buddha plant (Jul)
• My balcony
• My bedroom
• The lounge
• The landing
• My bathroom
• Photos on the wall

Cape Town (Nov, Dec)

• Hout Bay
• Kirstenbosch
• Matt's final days of high school
• Fun with Matt in the pool
• 7 a side rugby
• Silvermine for a swim
• Lunch on Jo's patio
• Walk in the Greenbelt
• The Spur
• Journey to Wilderness 
• Garden Route Game Lodge 
• Wilderness
• Sedgefield 
• Swellendam
• Driving home
• Xmas with the family (Dec)
• Chapman's Peak (Dec)
• Muizenberg to Kalk Bay walk (Dec)
• New Year's Eve at Blouberg (Dec)
• Visit Joanna and Steve (Jan)
• Matt's 14th birthday (Jan)
• Lunch at Katima (Jan)
• Swim at Danger Bay (Jan)
• Helping Matt get ready for school (Jan)
• Matt's first day of high school (Jan)
• Lunch with Heather (Jan)
• Clifton (Jan)
• Silvermine with family (Jan)
• Farewell dinner (Jan)

Jo's visit  (Jun, Jul)

• Balls Head walk 
• Circular Quay, Milson's Point and The Botanical Gardens  
• Manly Scenic walk 
• Blue Mountains hiking 
• Bondi Coogee walk
• Khao Pla, Dim Sung, The Boat House
• Visiting Ikea
• Walk from Waverton to Lady Macquarie's Chair
• The Fish Market
• The Chinese Garden and Darling Harbour
• ... and more

Russell's visit  (Nov)

• The Coastal Track (Royal National Park)
• The Canyon and Hanging Rock
• Mermaid Fall's

Trips

• New Year at Ashram (Jan)
• Farm with Brendan (Mar)
• Melbourne  (Mar)

Hikes  (14 hikes)

• Manly Scenic Walk with JC and Kim.  (Feb)
• Walk to Mount Solitary (May)
• Blue Mountains hiking with Jo (Jul)
• Manly Scenic walk with Jo  (Jul)
• Hiking with Sharon and co at Lane Cove  (Aug)
• Waterfall to Heathcote via Lake Eckersley  (Sep)
• Muogamarra Nature Reserve with Eckhart Group (Sep)
• Glenbrook National Park (with Geoff and Lydia)  (Oct)
• Berowora to Cowan (Oct)
• Manly Scenic Walk (with Eckhart Group)  (Oct)
• The Coastal Track (with Russell)  (Oct)
• The Canyon and Hanging Rock  (with Russell)  (Oct)
• Mermaid Fall's  (with Russell)  (Oct)
• La Perouse with Yogi (Nov)

Walks

• Ball's Head with Zante and co  (Feb)
• Ball's Head with Sharon (Mar)
• Easter walk round North Sydney and Waverton (Apr)
• Sunday stroll with Srini (May)
• Circular Quay, Milson's Point and The Botanical Gardens with Jo (Jul)
• Bondi Coogee walk with Jo (Jul)
• Balls Head walk with Jo (Jul)
• Walk from Waverton to Lady Macquarie's Chair (Jul)
• Lazy Sunday stroll with Srini  (Jul)
• Berry Island with Srini (Aug)
• Ball's Head with Lauren (Oct)
• Walk to Gore Cove with Yogi (Nov)

Outings

• Kayaking with Chris  (Jan)
• Banff Mountain Festival (May)
• Vivid with Sue (Jun)
• Heavy Metal evening (Aug)
• Frank Hurley presentation with Sue (Aug)
• Sculptures by The Sea (with Yogi) (Nov)
• Picnic with my Eckhart Group (Nov)

Photo shoots

• Photos for Shushann (May)
• Photo shoot for Lydia (Jun)

Birthdays

• Millie's 1st birthday  (Apr)
• Aimee's birthday at The Bot (Jul)
• My birthday at The Bot (Sep)
• Chris's party at The Bot  (Aug)
• Yogi's birthday (Oct)

Spirituality

• Meditation at Nic (May)
• Kirtan (May)

Friends

• Gavin's book launch (Mar)
• Evening at Shushann (Apr)
• Hiking Gang for breakfast  (Mar)
• Dinner at Liz (Jun)
• Michelle for dinner with hiking gang (Aug)
• Andreas and Ingrid come for lunch (Nov)
• The Botanica with Yogi (Nov)

Related

• Spiritual journey (2016)