}

13 February 2005

As a movieholic, I like this...

Things you would never know without the movies

- During all police investigations, it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once.

- When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.

- All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they are going to go off.

- A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

- Cars that crash will almost always burst into flames.

- If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.

- A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

- It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts

- your enemies will patiently attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

- All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets which reach up to the armpit level on a woman but only to the waist level on the man lying beside her.

- All grocery bags contain at least one stick of French Bread.

- The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place - noone will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building undetected.

- Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned to a partner who istheir polar opposite.

- The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.

- It is not necessary to say hello or goodbye when beginning or ending phone conversations.

- It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.

- Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds - unless it's the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.

- Television news bulletins usually contain a story that affects you personally at the precise moment that it is aired.

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